Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
