If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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