they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
