and you said cock pushups were impossible
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
