Kiss
Puke
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Randomize
