i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
