I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
