you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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