Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
