I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
