It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
