I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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