i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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