Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize
