Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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