Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
This baby is an asshole
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
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