she kept yelling 'call me bella'
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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