fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
The feeling are messing with the penis
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Randomize