Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Randomize
