how can u be prego again
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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