we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
