and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
What a dumb baby whore.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
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