So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
