normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
