he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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