fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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