I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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