She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
