i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
How naked do you want me to be?
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
