I wanna bring you to show and tell
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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