Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Who died my cat blue again?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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