YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
