Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
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