escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
