I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
