The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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