He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
