On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
