Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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