there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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