I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
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