..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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