Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
