He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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