She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Randomize
