your room smells of hookers.
And success
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
tell me about the fingering
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