If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
ugly people sure do ruin things
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
