I'm going to rape someone's good day.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
