the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize
