I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
