Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
